Ben Graham

Going, Going, Gone

    "I grew up on baseball; Iıve been playing ever since I can remember. I always kept up with the big leagues and knew all the players. My grandmother gave me Topps baseball sets every time I had a birthday, she still does."

    Zack Parker pitched for the Class A Colorado Rockies affiliate, the Asheville Tourists, in North Carolina this past baseball season. Currently, he is back in Austin, where he lives in the off-season.

    "When I started hearing about guys using steroids and seeing these monsters, I was pretty torn in my reaction. One side of me understood that they needed to do what they needed to do, but I also felt like it wasnıt fair to those who held records and those who werenıt using. Now, as a professional player, the people I see using arenıt on a television in my living room, theyıre right in front of me."

    Steroids were first developed in the 1930ıs. The Germans first experimented on dogs then later on their soldiers in World War II. In the 1950ıs, many Russian and European athletes found that steroids were very beneficial in power lifting. They began shattering records and dominating the sport. Later that decade, it was proven that testosterone was the chemical behind the improved athletic ability. A few years later, pharmaceutical companies began making steroids available on the market. In March of 1991, congress passed the Federal Anabolic Control Act, which made steroids illegal without a prescription. The only way to get them now is on the black market (History of Steroids, 2002).

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    Zack was born in Paris, Texas, where he lived until the age of 10. At that point his mother and father divorced and he moved to Austin to start a new life with his mom and younger brother.

    He explains that he was "sort of chubby" as a child and that no one really took him seriously. He had a few close friends but to everyone else, he says, "I became like a comedian type person because itıs what every thought of me as anyway. I just let myself fit into that mold."

    Zack always had talent. He could throw the ball hard and hit the ball hard. He tells me that on one of the teams he played for as a kid, the coach had him playing shortstop even though heıs left-handed.

    "I was the best one on the team and the coach really didnıt have a clue about baseball, so he just put me at shortstop. I played for a lot of coaches that really didnıt know what the hell they were doing."

    Zack never performed well in school. His teachers were always getting on his case about late papers and projects; he didnıt study for tests and so his grades were usually low.

    "I did just about enough to get by. Most of the classes I took in middle school and high school I made Cıs in. I failed my share of classes too. I just never had any discipline growing up. I could do the work but I just didnıt care enough to sit down and start."

    Zack attended Westwood high school from the fall of 1995 to the spring of 1999. His image of being a goof-off had only grown thicker and his apathy in school was obvious in his grades.

    ³My senior year I found out I had to retake a semester of freshman English in order to graduate. It was so embarrassing having to be in a classroom with a bunch of freshman, I know they were thinking I was fucking retarded. Iım so glad all that shitıs over with.²

    On the high school baseball team, the story wasnıt much different for Zack. The coaches offered him little respect and saw him as a lazy underachiever.

    "One practice I had to run around our fields backwards until I was told to stop because I smirked when the head coach was talking. The coach that made me take off just forgot about me and I ran for an hour and a half, backwards. Another time I had to mow the entire area behind the outfield fence due to my failing a class. The grass was waist high and by the time I was finished my legs were covered in bites and scratches. I was so close to quitting that day."

    "I constantly had to attend mandatory study halls enforced by the coach. It was for players in danger of failing classes. For weeks at a time I had to be in a classroom at 8:00am every morning, an hour before school started."

    Zack didnıt pitch on the varsity team until his senior year. During his time as a junior, he was placed on the JV for the second year in a row. He batted .700 and never came close to losing a game on the mound.

    ³It was ridiculous, I batted cleanup and I didnıt even consider myself to be a hitter.  I was hitting the ball off the wall every game. I have to admit, though, it was fun to hit the ball like that, even if it was just J.V.²

    "The Varsity coach didnıt like me. If I went to any other high school I would have been a varsity starter my junior year, maybe sooner. Iım just glad I got to shove it their face later."

    Zack went on to graduate as the 15th from last student in his class of 450. He was drafted by Atlanta after high school with his one-year varsity experience, but never signed a contract with them. After two years at a junior college in Houston where he broke Yankee starter Andy Pettiteıs pick-off record, Zack signed with the Rockies for $625,000.

    "After high school I started to get really serious about baseball. I worked hard, stayed in shape, threw everyday, and took care of my arm. I never iced my arm once after I pitched before, not even in high school, now I do it all the time.²

    ³What forced me to get my act together was the fact that I knew baseball would be all I have. I knew I needed to start giving myself a chance to compete with the best."

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"If a young player were to ask me what to do, Iım not going to tell him [using steroids] is bad. Look at all the money in the game: You have a chance to set your family up, to get your daughter into a better schoolŠ So I canıt say, ŒDonıt do it,ı not when the guy next to you is as big as a house and heıs going to take your job and make the money (Caminiti).

    ³I always want to fell like Iım in control of my body while Iım on the field², says Zack. ³Thatıs why I donıt use substances that could alter who I am.²

    ³One time when I was around twelve, I was in my backyard getting ready to leave for a little league game. I found a pouch of chew so I decided to try some.  I had it in my cheek and started swinging my bat, pretending like I was in the major leagues. I got so sick I couldnıt go to the game. The way I felt that day outweighed any possibility of my trying that anymore.²

    "I feel the same way about steroids," states Zack. "I donıt think people should risk messing themselves up, whether it be chew or steroids. In this business, though, you donıt look down on guys who use; itıs their choice. Everyone knows itıs a game of numbers; some guys use just to keep up with the best, and some of the best who use, turn into supermen. If I had a kid who wanted to use, I wouldnıt let him, if he were grown it would be up to him."

    In an article published by Sports Illustratedıs Tom Verducci, a highly regarded sports journalist, he addresses concerns about the effect continuing steroid use will have on the game and its fans.

    "Baseball is a game built upon trust. If there is no faith in the legitimacy of the competition and the records, then baseball moves closer to the realms of pro-wrestling" (Verducci, 2002).

    In a contrasting light, Dan Daly of The Washington Times believes if steroids were weaned out of baseball, the industry would be affected negatively.

    "Its fan base is getting older," Daly writes, "testing [for steroids] doesnıt figure to improve the situation. Geezers like me might not mind deflated power stats, but thereıs a whole generation of Americans, kids approaching adulthood, who have known nothing but Œgoing, going, goneı their entire lives" (Daly, 2002).

    "The fans are all baseball has to back it up. Itıs like currency: If people lose faith in the dollar, it becomes worthless," Zack explains. I donıt have any answers as to how steroids in baseball will affect its fans, but its use by players has spiraled out of control. Itıs a race and nobody wants to be disadvantaged. Itıs like being stuck in traffic on an interstate: one guy drives through the grass median to get to the access road. Pretty soon everybodyıs doing it."

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    The days that Zack pitches he has a fairly set routine: wake up around 11:30am, grab something to eat, and go see a movie or play video games. He arrives at the field around 4:00pm and goes over scouting reports on the team heıll face. From there he retreats to the training room to stretch, then hits the mound. After the game he stretches, ices his arm, and goes home.

    "I used to get so nervous before a start. Now I usually go see a movie by myself before I go to the field. It really calms my nerves and allows me not to think about anything. Once I get to the locker room Iıll see guys taking pills to give them a boost and get them pumped up, itıs really common."

    In another article Verducci writes, "The idea of playing baseball without taking amphetamines or some other stimulants is so absurd to some major leaguers that they have a catchphrase for it: playing naked" (Verducci, 2002).              

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    In the off-season, Zack works out everyday. One day itıs legs, another itıs arms, then cardio. He throws with a friend and former high school teammate, Kelly Johnson, who was drafted by the Braves after high school in the first round. I watch as both guys workout for well over an hour.

    "Itıs a huge part of the game," says Zack. "You have to workout as much as your body can handle and just keep tearing down and rebuilding stronger muscles. I am curious as to what steroids would do for me physically, but like I said Iım not going to go out and do it, especially while Iım doing well."

    While many fans and critics rightly assume steroid use among hitters, pitchers are not off the hook from speculation. White Sox slugger Frank Thomas, a rare outspoken advocate of instituting steroid testing, says pitchers are just as guilty as hitters.

    "I want testing tomorrow. I think a lot of pitchers are on it, too, to throw harder and get more of an animal mentality. That stuff gives you an animal mentality" (Thomas, 2002).

    Arizona Diamondbacks manager Bob Brenly says half jokingly, "some hitters have discovered you can hit the ball a lot farther, when pitchers figure out a way to use it to their advantage, weıll see guys out there throwing 130mph" (Brenly, 2002).

    The prevalence of steroids in professional baseball, and other sports for that matter, is due to the drugıs accessibility. Jeff Zillgit of USA Today says, "Do a Google search on Steroids and tell me how easily you think youıd be able to get your hands on the goods" (Zillgitt, 2002).

    "At this level all I have to do is tell someone I want to start a cycle and I could have a supplier that day", Zack explains, "itıs ridiculous how easy they are to get. Itıs easy to tell who uses too. Iıll see guys show up at spring training so jacked up they canıt throw. Their heads, especially around their jaws, are noticeably bigger, and they come out looking like Mr. Potato Head.²

    The whole reason why steroids have been illegal for the past 40 or so years is because theyıre dangerous. The excess testosterone entering the body can render a person unable to produce testosterone on their own. Thereıs no telling how many years they take off a personıs life either.

    Ken Caminiti, whose 15-year big league career ended with the Atlanta Braves, revealed the effects steroids had on him. He says, in an article published in Sports Illustrated, that in the beginning steroids improved his ability noticeably. He began to use them more and more over the next five seasons. He used steroids so heavily in 1996 that his testicles shrank and retracted. "I got really strong, really quick. I pulled a lot of muscles. Iım still paying for it. My tendons and ligaments got all torn up and it took four months for my nuts to drop on their own" (Caminiti, 2002).

    Curt Schilling, a pitcher for the Arizona Diamondbacks, describes congratulating players: "Iıll pat guys on the ass and theyıll look at me and go, ŒDonıt hit me there, man. It hurtsı" (Schilling, 2002).

    "Itıs pretty fucked up," exclaims Zack. "I hear guys joking around and bragging about the kind of stuff they take. Itıs just a part of the game, though. Itıs become so imbedded in the culture that no one questions or lectures anyone about what they do, not even trainers."

   The Texas Rangers were packing their gear after a game last year when a player dropped a small bag near his locker. Several vials of steroids rolled out. The player, not fazed, gave a slight chuckle and picked them up. No one in the room showed any surprise (Shea, 2002).

    "Thereıs no doubt in my mind guys like Sosa and Bonds use steroids to get the numbers theyıve put up," says Zack. "Look at Barry back in the early 90ıs, even near the mid 90ıs: he must have put on fifty pounds of muscle since then. The same goes for Sosa."

    Unfathomable homerun numbers have further spawned allegations of steroid use. Roger Maris had a single season homerun record of 61 that stood for nearly forty years. Then out of nowhere McGuire hit 70, Sosa hit 66 and Bonds hit 73 all within a few years of each other. Journalist Jeff Zillgit believes the jump "more than raises suspicion" (Zillgit, 2002).

    When Bonds was asked his opinion of the attention being given to steroids he said it was no oneıs business what players do to their bodies. He later said, "Doctors ought to quit worrying about what ballplayers are taking. It takes more than muscles to hit homers. If all those guys were using stuff, how come theyıre not all hitting homers?" (Bonds, 2002).

    In a similar interview/confrontation, Sosa met with Sports Illustratedıs Rick Reilly. When being asked how he transformed from a 165-pound speedster, to a bulky 230-pound giant, Sosa returns, "When I first came to Texas (in 1989), I had a bad wisdom tooth. The doctor discovered this, and he fixed it. After that, I start to eat much better" (Sosa, 2002). Iım sure anyone hearing this would be quite doubtful of the validity in Sosaıs words.

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    Tom Verducci refers to this trend as "baseballıs worst kept secret" (Verducci, 2002). Itıs out, the public knows but how they react is yet to be determined. Up to this point, at least at the professional level, the feelings are, "hey, just do what you gotta do and Iıll turn the other way.²

    "Players and managers wonıt get on a guy for using," states Zack. "The way they look at it is, itıs your decision. If a guyıs punching stuff and freaking out from ³roid-rage², then the coach would probably do something, but as long as no oneıs drawing any major attention to himself they stay out of your business."

    ³The bottom line at this level is winning. You got coaches screaming at you, screaming at umpires, itıs really intense most times. The whole scene will make you want to get as intense and tough as everyone else around. In that aspect I can think using could come about from anxiety and fear.²

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    Zack looks forward to the next season as he ascends in the minor league circuit. His new team will be in Visalia, a new Rockies affiliate in the higher class A California League.

    "Iım really proud of myself for coming this far. Baseball means everything to me and itıs all Iıve got right now. Itıs not like I can quit and go to law school. Iım also proud because Iıve arrived at this point without any boosts from substances. Iım lucky to even be in a position to pitch at the next level. There are players on these teams out here who know theyıre never going to advance. Some of them tell their parents they have still have a shot, just so the parents wonıt make them quit and come home to get a job."

    "I know a lot of people wish this sport wasnıt corrupted with substances worthy of putting asterisks next to the new records being set, myself included, but itıs just the way it is. Itıs every bit a dog-eat-dog atmosphere and if some guys arenıt willing to do everything within their realm of capabilities, they may not make it. Itıs always going to be a game of inches."

    Zack finished the year in Asheville with a 16-7 record with 119 strikeouts and 64 walks in 168 1/3 innings. His wins were the highest by a pitcher at Asheville since the club became an affiliate of the Rockies in 1994, and the most overall since 1977. His first Topps baseball card will be issued in the 2003. Iım sure the next set of cards Zack gets from his grandmother will be a little more special.

Colorado pitcher Zack Parker has repertoire and disposition to make rapid ascent. Collectors will want to be on the lookout in 2003 for lefty Zack Parker. If any Rockiesı prospect has the disposition to pitch in hitter-friendly Coors Field, it very well may be Parker, whose mound presence is well beyond his years. ‹Topps News Letter